Thursday, June 10, 2010

The Card

I was recently walking through a mall and passed by a card shop. Since I needed to get some cards, I went in and picked out the three that I needed. I walked up to the register to pay and the cashier said “Sir, all of our cards are buy three, get one free, you should go ahead and get one more.” That sounded like a good idea, so I looked around wondering, what kind of card should I get?

There were birthday cards, wedding cards, sympathy cards, get well soon cards, thank you cards, and so on. The problem was, I had already picked out the three that I wanted. As I looked at the choices, I tried to think about the recipient, looking for the perfect card. The problem was, I didn’t have a particular recipient in mind. I looked at the cards and tried to match them to the recipient rather than thinking of someone and finding a card for them. It just wasn’t working. So, I decided I would just get one of those blank cards that you can use for any occasion. But none of them were quite right, none of them were masculine enough for me to use “just because.”

Then I saw it. Splashed across the front it said “Leap and the net will appear.” It was blank inside, so that I could write whatever I wanted. It was perfect. I knew it was the card that I should buy. It was the perfect card for – well, for who? It was as clear as day to me that it was the right card, but I didn’t know who it was for. So I bought it anyway.

It was only as I paid for the cards that I realized who the last card was for. It was absolutely perfect – for me. I was buying the card for myself.

Perhaps the biggest weakness in my faith, and one that I struggle with all the time, is my desire to remain in control. Sure, I trust you Lord, and I know you will take care of me, but I really want to know HOW? As it is said in “Somewhere in the Middle” by Casting Crowns, I have “deep water faith in the shallow end.” I’m afraid to leap before I know that the net is firmly in place. When I pray for guidance, I ask that the Lord make the path clear for me, rather than that the Lord direct me or make the decision clear to me. Even when the decision seems clear, I struggle with hesitation unless I know that the path is going to be clear.

What I need to work on accepting is that God has never promised me a clear path. God has never promised me that I will always feel safe. What God has promised me is that He has plans for me, plans to prosper me and not to harm me, plans to give me hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11. I just need to learn to trust in those plans, even when I don’t see the net.

Leap and the net will appear.

1 comment:

Heidi Willis said...

I love this post!!

I love that card. I hope you have it up somewhere you can see it when you need to.